Disclaimer: Starfleet belongs to Paramount. No infringement intended.

Summary: In which our favorite command team find out that being a team is what they do best.

Terra Nova

by Mizvoy

Chapter 4: Reconstruction

One week later, Chakotay made his way through the darkened hangar and approached the partially disassembled shuttle. When he peered into the engineering section, he spied two very shapely legs sticking out from beneath a console. Soft Bajoran jazz filled the compartment and a slim booted foot moved with the rhythm of the music.

“Kathryn? You’re still here?”

She slid out from beneath the console, wiping her hands on a rag. “Obviously. I said I’d leave as soon as I finish this. Why?”

“I thought you’d left an hour ago. I’d already locked up the hangar.”

She sat up, frowning. “What time is it?”

“Here, it’s 745. But in Indiana, it’s . . .”

“It’s 945,” she interrupted. “Damn. I missed dinner again. Did my mother call?”

“Just now. I told her I thought you were gone, and she just laughed. She suggested I feed you here since you never seem to touch the plates she leaves for you.” He reached down and helped her to her feet.

“In other words, she was angry with me. And who could blame her? I’ve missed dinner three nights in a row.”

“She didn’t sound mad. I think she’s used to the way you become engrossed in your work and ignore her.”

Kathryn grimaced. “I’m afraid it’s a lifelong habit.”

“You can apologize later. I was sitting down to eat.” They walked out of the hanger, shutting down the power and locking the office door on their way to the cabin. “Aren’t you hungry?”

As if on cue, Kathryn’s stomach growled. “Now that you mention it . . .” They laughed and started up the hill arm in arm.

They lingered over dinner, their conversation covering dozens of topics from the progress they’d made on the “Terra Nova” as they called the shuttle, to the recent presidential elections, to Miral Paris’ second birthday party. They were halfway through their second bottle of wine when Kathryn yawned.

“I’d better head for home or I’ll meet myself beaming back in the morning.”

Chakotay smiled. “You have no idea what time it is, do you?”

“I’m not sure I want to know.”

“It’s after 0100.”

“You’re kidding! I can’t sneak into Mom’s house at 0300! I’ll wake up the dogs and create havoc.”

“I agree. You’ll have to stay in my guest room tonight.”

She sighed as she closed her eyes and leaned back in her chair, stifling another yawn, suddenly drowsy. “I don’t think I have a choice.”

He stood up and guided her down the hall. “I think you should stay here until the project’s finished, Kathryn. How much sense does it make to beam back to Indiana to sleep only to return first thing in the morning? Besides, you put in more hours here than you did at Starfleet.”

“Because I love the work. I’d consider it, but I’m afraid staying here would scandalize my mom.”

“I don’t think so,” he replied as he ushered into the small cozy room. On the bed was Kathryn’s suitcase. “She beamed your stuff over when she called. She thinks you should ‘live where you work,’ in her words.”

Kathryn shook her head. “That woman never ceases to amaze me.”

Chakotay just laughed. “She’s a Janeway, that’s why.”

Kathryn sipped coffee in the hanger office and watched through the window as Chakotay and Annika spoke privately for the first time since their breakup. They both seemed relaxed and friendly, and Kathryn hoped that they’d found their way past any hurt feelings. She was glad that Annika and Axum had found happiness together, regretting only that it had come at Chakotay’s expense.

Harry Kim let himself into the office and headed for the replicator. “I should’ve called to let you know Annika and Axum were coming with me,” he apologized.

“That would’ve been nice,” she agreed, closing her eyes as she remembered the pain she’d seen on Chakotay’s face when the couple arrived. “But maybe it was better this way.”

“I never thought that relationship would work,” Harry Kim said, as he poured himself a cup of coffee and looked out into the hangar bay. “At least, not anywhere but in the limited universe of Voyager.”

Kathryn turned to him with a smile. “I always thought you were better suited for her, Harry. For awhile there, I thought you were hopelessly snared.”

“For awhile, I was,” he grinned back, blushing. “I got over it, though. Eventually.”

“Axum is perfect for her.”

“In so many ways,” Harry agreed, glancing toward Axum, the tall blond alien who was working on the Terra Nova’s port nacelle. “He’s known and loved Annika for a many years, and he’s struggling with all the same Borg drone experiences she is.”

“I can’t tell you how much we appreciate your coming to help us this weekend. I think we’ve done a week’s worth of work in the last two days.”

“It’s been fun.” Harry didn’t mention how curious they’d been about the former command team’s joint project. The rumors were progressing through Voyager’s former crew at light speed, and Harry had been tasked with reconnaissance. So far, all he’d seen was the familiar friendship and teasing between them. But they were staying together in the rustic cabin and spending all their time together. “We both want to help the colony.”

They watched as Chakotay gave Annika a chaste one-armed hug and headed for the office. Meanwhile, Annika took a direct path toward Axum, a look of relief on her face. The parting was obviously amicable.

“Guess I’ll get back to work,” Harry said, pouring what was left of his coffee into the sink. “Icheb is supposed to be finishing the astrometrics upgrade and will be wanting me to go over it with him.”

Harry let Chakotay into the office as he left, giving his former command team a chance to talk privately and wishing he could be a fly on the wall. He’d wondered if the two of them would realize that they were perfect for each other now that Annika was permanently out of the picture. He hoped so. He wanted them to be happy.

“Chakotay,” Kathryn asked, “do you regret our decision to ask them to help us?”

“Not at all. The repairs are progressing much faster over the last two days thanks to their help.” He replicated a cup of tea, noticing Kathryn’s silence and realizing that she had probably been referring to his talk with Annika. “Unless you think I’m uncomfortable with Annika and Axum.”

“The thought had occurred to me.”

“I had to face facts sooner or later. Might as well get it over with.” He sipped his tea and sighed. “Besides, I was always going to come in second to her memories of him.”

“I didn’t realize that Annika was carrying a torch for anyone.” She turned to him, her eyes soft. “So, how are you, really?”

“I’m fine. Really.” He studied his mug, and then he shrugged. “It wasn’t meant to be, I guess. Anyway, how can I feel sorry for myself when she’s so happy. Axum’s perfect for her.”

Kathryn walked close and looked into his eyes. “People say that, but I’m not so naïve as to believe it. Knowing someone else is happy doesn’t mean you are if they’ve broken your heart.” She thought about how sorry she’d felt for herself when the admiral had told her Annika and Chakotay were going to be married. She’d wanted so much to be happy for them, but the thought of them together hurt too much.

“My heart isn’t broken, Kathryn.”

“I’m glad. I want you to be happy, Chakotay. I want everyone to be happy.”

“Even Kathryn?” He grinned at the surprised look on her face. “You never think of yourself, do you? Working with you makes me happy.”

“If that’s all it takes, then I think you’d better raise your happiness threshold.”

He stepped closer and lifted her face with a hand beneath her chin, his eyes suddenly dark with passion. “I’m afraid that raising that bar would require the modification of some long-standing parameters.”

They stared into each other’s eyes, and Kathryn discovered she couldn’t breathe, much less talk. She thought for a tantalizing moment that he would kiss her, but just as she was about to close her eyes and lean toward him, Icheb burst into the office. They separated quickly, embarrassed to be caught in a near embrace, but Icheb was oblivious to the intimate scene he’d just interrupted.

“Guess what!” he said, his face glowing with excitement. “Annika and Axum are getting married!”

Later that night, while Chakotay secured the hangar and set up the security net around the cabin, Kathryn lounged in a hot tub of water and thought about all of the work they’d accomplished over the weekend. The project would be coming to an end in just a couple of weeks, and the thought of that, the thought of returning to her do-nothing job and of Chakotay’s departure, caused a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach.

There could only be one reason for her sadness, and it was time to face it: she was in love with Chakotay. She had never let herself acknowledge her feelings for him before. When they’d first met, she’d been engaged to Mark Johnson and Chakotay had been the criminal she’d been forced to take as her first officer in order to survive. Later, she’d refused to consider him as an eligible man because of Starfleet protocol, because she needed him so much more as her friend and first officer. Then, on Voyager’s return, there’d been his budding relationship with Annika, and when that ended, his sudden departure for the Triax Colony. But the last few weeks of working with him had been a blissful and pleasurable experience reminiscent of New Earth. She had forgotten just how much she enjoyed being with him, how she never tired of his company.

With a sigh, she stepped out of the tub and dried off, putting on a warm flannel gown and robe against the chill of the desert night. Before turning in, she decided to take the quilt from her bed and spend a few minutes in quiet meditation on the screened porch of the cabin where she could look up at the stars. She walked through the dark living room and settled onto a lounge chair just as Chakotay started his shower. His bathroom shared an outside wall with the porch, and Kathryn could hear him as he began to sing, as he always did, while showering.

She remembered how she’d teased him about that habit on New Earth, but he’d only grinned at her: “I sound like Anton Marsei in there, Kathryn. Even the doctor would be jealous of me. You should join me sometime and find out for yourself.” His eyes had sparkled with mischief as he’d teased her, but she wondered what he would think if she told him how often she’d actually dreamed of joining him there. But, he wouldn’t believer her. His involvement with Annika was proof that he’d given up on anything like that ever happening between them. Her strict adherence to protocol in the Delta Quadrant had no doubt convinced him that she was asexual at best, frigid at worst.

And who was she to force herself on him at this late date? What mattered right now was the feeling she had of contentment, of doing something useful and making a difference in the lives of people who mattered to her. The Terra Nova would be a reliable workhorse for the colony, one she was proud to help provide them. The fact that it was her father’s design was especially poignant to her, because it connected her father and Chakotay in a way that she treasured. Plus, the complete restoration of her friendship with Chakotay was beyond price. She hadn’t been this happy since the last few weeks on New Earth.

Suddenly drowsy, she pulled the quilt around her and closed her eyes. Perhaps if she just thought about those lost days, if she concentrated on Chakotay’s voice in the shower, she’d fall asleep with a smile on her face and keep that happiness even after he was gone.

An hour later, Chakotay tossed and turned in his bed unable to fall asleep. The excitement of the day had left him exhausted, yet unsettled. It had been difficult, at first, to see Annika with Axum, yet he’d discovered that he liked the man and soon realized how good they were together. When they announced their upcoming marriage, he’d been happy for them, yet also dejected and lonely, especially after the electrifying moment of connection with Kathryn in the hangar office.

For the first time in the nine years he’d known her, she’d seemed open to him, emotionally vulnerable, and he had become immediately aroused, much to his embarrassment. He wondered what might’ve happened if Icheb hadn’t interrupted them when he did, and then shook his head. He’d never get to sleep if he thought about that. He’d learned over the years to repress his feelings for her. She’d made it clear that she was uninterested in him, whatever the reason, and he’d decided to settle for the friendship she was willing to offer rather than push for anything more.

He decided that a mug of warm milk might help him fall asleep. As he left his room, he noticed a bar of light beneath Kathryn’s closed door and considered, briefly, talking to her about his insomnia. If ever there would be an expert on sleeplessness, it would be Kathryn Janeway. But he quickly thought better of it. He sensed that she was a big part of his problem, and seeing her in her bedroom, in her nightclothes, would do nothing to help him relax.

He was almost to the kitchen when he noticed that the door to the porch was unlocked, even though he was sure he’d locked it before he’d taken his shower. He peered out into the darkened porch and saw Kathryn rolled up in a quilt, fast asleep on a lounge chair. He considered letting her sleep through the night out there, but then a chilled breeze blew through the door and he knew she would grow cold before dawn.

He knelt down beside her and for a few moments just looked at her. He thought she was more beautiful than ever, more rested and relaxed, closer to the woman he’d known on New Earth. He reached out and gently pushed a strand of hair away from her face. Her eyes opened and she smiled at him.

“Hi. You fell asleep on the porch again,” he said.

“I’m cold!” she complained, pulling the quilt closer around her. “I should get up and go to my nice warm bed.”

“Let me help.” He scooped her up from the lounge chair, easily cradling her small body against his chest. “This way you won’t have to lose the warmth you’ve generated in there.”

She didn’t protest, but just snuggled into his neck with a sigh. “You smell good.”

“I just got out of the shower.” He paused long enough to lock the porch door before heading toward her bedroom.

“I heard you in there. Your singing is better than I remember,” she teased. “I almost recognized the tune this time.”

He grinned and sang softly, “‘The day I met you, I found the meaning of love; Who knew a woman could be an angel from above?'”

Tears filled her eyes. “I wasn’t much of a woman out there, Chakotay, or an angel either. I was the captain through and through, and nothing else.”

“I saw the woman.”

She lifted her head to look into his eyes. He stopped just inside her bedroom door. “You did, didn’t you?” she whispered, cradling his face in her palm. She wanted to kiss him. “I never thanked you for that.”

“You’re welcome. I still see a woman. A very beautiful woman.”

“Oh, Chakotay,” she sighed. She slid from his arms, standing and pulling his body close, her arms around his waist. This might be their last chance, and she wasn’t going to let it pass her by. “What happened between us in the office today?”

“I . . . I wasn’t sure . . . how you feel about me.”

“I’m so sorry about that.”

His heart sank. Just as he thought, she didn’t reciprocate his feelings. “Don’t apologize, Kathryn. It’s not your fault.”

“What’s not my fault?” she pulled back to look up at him.

“Just because I love you doesn’t mean you’re obligated to love me. I understand.”

“But I do love you, Chakotay. I’ve loved you for years.”

For a moment he was too stunned to speak. “Wh-what?”

“What I’m sorry about is that I couldn’t tell you before, couldn’t show you before how much I care about you.”

“You love me.”

She laughed, burrowing into his chest. “Is that so hard to believe? Haven’t you sensed the attraction between us all these years?”

“I did, but I didn’t know if you did,” he admitted, putting his arms around her. “You never seemed to.”

“That’s what I regret, Chakotay. And I want to make it up to you.”

“You do?”

She took his hand, leading him toward the bed. “Stay with me tonight?”

He hesitated. She turned and looked at him, her eyes troubled. “I can’t be casual about this, Kathryn. I can’t have a brief fling with you. That would break my heart.”

Her eyes softened as she realized that he needed reassurance just as much as she did. “I don’t know what my future holds, Chakotay, whether I’ll be in Starfleet this time next month, whether I’ll have another ship and sent into deep space, whether I’ll be promoted or unemployed. But I want my future to include you. And I’ll work with you to make sure it happens. Whatever it takes.” She looked up at him, tears shimmering in her eyes. “This isn’t a brief fling. I love you too much for that.”

“We’ll work things out,” he repeated, pulling her close, burying his face in her hair. He’d spent enough years in Starfleet to know what she was asking of him, but he didn’t care. She loved him, and that was all that mattered. “Nothing can defeat us, Kathryn, when we work together.”

Nothing can defeat us, she thought, unless we decide not to fight.

To be continued