Disclaimer: Star Trek: Voyager and all things Starfleet belong to Paramount. No infringement intended.
Summary: Another take on the future following Endgame.
Safe Harbor
by Mizvoy
Chapter 3: Conflict
Kathryn Janeway stepped off of the transport station and looked around with intense interest at Dorvan V, the planet she had heard so much about from Chakotay and the rest of the Maquis. Behind her, Richard Laramie quietly made arrangements for their baggage to be taken to the local hotel.
“Is it what you expected?” he asked, joining her on the front porch of the transport station.
She smiled at him and shook her head. “I thought it would be much drier. A desert.”
“According to the transport operator, this is the rainy season.” They started walking toward the hotel, a white adobe building that shimmered in the midday sun. “I thought someone would be here to meet you.”
“I didn’t tell them exactly when we’d be arriving. I wanted a chance to look around on my own first.”
He nodded and let her walk beside him in silence. Kathryn was oddly emotional about her Voyager crew, and he’d learned long ago to let that part of her life alone. She hadn’t seen any of these people in six years, but that wasn’t really surprising. The trip to Earth took over two weeks and the cost was prohibitive for most people. He and Kathryn had been on DS9 for a conference and had decided to visit Dorvan before heading back to Earth.
“When’s the party?” he asked.
“Tomorrow night. Three weddings and four baby showers in less than four hours. Should be fun.”
“At least this time they gave you time to get here for the celebrations.”
She looked away. He was talking about Chakotay and Seven’s wedding, of course, four years earlier. Kathryn had received her invitation just a week before the event and three days after she’d left on a three-month mission into the Beta Quadrant—in the opposite direction. Richard believed they’d done it on purpose, scheduled their wedding and delayed the announcement to prevent her attendance, but Kathryn refused to agree. “Not everyone believes in long engagements,” she’d said. They’d never discussed it again, but he knew she still thought about what he’d said.
They settled into their hotel room, ate a leisurely dinner at a local restaurant, and finally decided to have a few drinks at the hotel’s crowded bar. Kathryn sat down in the dimly lit room and sipped her wine. “I talked to Tom and B’Elanna. They’ll pick us up at 1300 tomorrow.”
“Good,” he said, taking her hand, “we can sleep in.”
She squeezed his hand and smiled, happy, relaxed, and ready to flirt. “Will you let me sleep?”
“I’ll try not to wake you up,” he joked, enjoying her throaty chuckle. Suddenly she stiffened, her eyes wide. “What is it?”
She didn’t answer him, but simply stood up to greet the man walking to their table. “Chakotay. How did you know we were here?”
He laughed and gave her a quick hug. “When B’Elanna said you’d arrived, I knew you’d be here. There’s only one decent hotel within a radius of fifty miles.” He released her and turned, extending his hand. “You must be Admiral Laramie.”
“Richard,” he said, rising and shaking hands. “Won’t you join us?”
Chakotay glanced at Kathryn. “I won’t be intruding?”
“Of course not,” she said. “We came here to see you. Where’s Seven?”
“She spent the afternoon watching Miral and the miracles while Tom and B’Elanna finalized arrangements for the party,” he said. The miracles were what everyone called Tom and B’Elanna’s newborn twin sons, Harry and Neelix. “She was so exhausted by the time B’Elanna ‘relieved her of duty’ (her words, by the way),” he added, his eyes twinkling, “that she went straight to her regeneration chamber. She said she’d see you tomorrow, once she’d recovered.”
Kathryn smiled. “I’d probably have a nervous breakdown.” She looked around, noticing that the waiters were still busy. “Would you like a drink?”
“Iced tea?”
Kathryn headed for the bar, leaving the two men alone “to get acquainted with each other” while she got Chakotay’s drink. Laramie was taller than Chakotay and thinner, but he was powerfully built with long muscles, obviously a one-time athlete. Some ten years older than Kathryn, his hair was totally grey, but his face seemed young, tan, fit.
The two men sat down at the table in uncomfortable silence. Chakotay sensed that Laramie was introspective and aloof, and his attitude seemed distant and superior. He could sense the man’s disapproval in every move he made.
“So,” Chakotay said, “you’re the Judge Advocate General?”
“A glorified judge, really,” he replied.
“Don’t be so modest. You have a lot of power, I’m sure. You can set policy and decide just exactly how laws will be interpreted. I hear you have the inside track to the Supreme Court.”
“I’ve had some good breaks. It helps to be in the right place at the right time.”
“Like being Kathryn’s legal counsel. I heard you pulled a lot of strings for that assignment.”
Richard heard the criticism in Chakotay’s voice. “I’m not an ambulance chaser, if that’s what you’re implying. I thought her case would be a challenge.”
“Plus it was great publicity and a chance to meet the Federation’s most recent hero, who just happened to be a beautiful single woman.”
“What exactly are you implying, Chakotay?”
“I have friends in SJA,” he said. “They said that you pursued her relentlessly. That you had designs on her while you were still a married man.”
“My marriage had been over for years,” he replied, his anger rising, “and my feelings for Kathryn couldn’t be more genuine.”
Chakotay just looked away. This was going badly, and he knew he needed to change things or risk Kathryn’s disapproval. “I never doubted that,” he said.
The tension at the table was palpable as Kathryn put the glass of tea in front of Chakotay. “This is wonderful! I’ve wanted you two to meet for years.”
Richard was furious, hurt, and uncomfortable. He stood up. “Kathryn, I’m tired. I think I’ll go to our room and let you two renew your friendship.”
Surprised, Kathryn stood and put her hand on his arm. “What’s wrong?” she whispered. “Why are you being so rude?”
“Ask him,” he replied as he turned to leave. “Good night.”
Kathryn stood bewildered as Richard stormed out of the bar to the elevators without so much as a glance over his shoulder. She sat back down and looked at Chakotay. “What happened?”
Chakotay studied his hands as a blush crawled up his neck and onto his cheeks. He couldn’t bear to look at the hurt and worry on her face. “I’m sorry, Kathryn. It’s my fault.”
She sighed. “You might as well let me hear your side of this, Chakotay, because I’m sure I’ll hear Richard’s. Did you have a disagreement?”
“You could say that.” The silence was deafening as she stared at him, waiting for him to continue.
When he remained silent, she frowned. “I haven’t seen you in six years. I’ve looked forward to this, Chakotay. I’ve missed you terribly. And you start by picking a fight with Richard?” He remained silent. “You don’t like him?”
“I don’t trust him.”
She shook her head in disbelief. “You don’t trust Starfleet’s Staff Judge Advocate.”
“I think he’s using you.”
“Using me,” she echoed, studying his face. “Chakotay, we’ve been together for nearly six years. I’m no longer the celebrity I once was, and I certainly am not a sweet young thing on his arm.” He glanced up at her, and then looked away, clearly uncomfortable. “I think I deserve an honest answer.”
He stood up. “I should just leave.”
She stood up and blocked his exit, aware of the eyes watching them at the surrounding tables. She hissed, “Will you please sit down?” He swallowed and obeyed; he knew an order when he heard one. When she resumed her seat, she said, “You’re just going to leave? The way you left DS9 two years ago? Without even bothering to talk to me?”
He could see the fury in her eyes. “Deep Space Nine?”
“Don’t be coy with me, Chakotay. After my speech, when the house lights came up, you stood up in the back of the auditorium, and then you left. Don’t say it wasn’t you, because I looked for you later that night. You checked out of your room just six hours after you arrived. Six hours. And the only place you went was the opening of the conference in the auditorium. You travel for over two days from Dorvan V, register at the conference, check into a room for six hours, and then spend two more days getting home?”
“Something came up,” he whispered.
“What? What came up? B’Elanna said they were surprised when you came back so soon.”
He looked around at the rest of the patrons in the bar, all of them pretending to ignore their argument. “This isn’t the place to talk. Let’s take a walk.”
They left the bar by the terrace doors and walked to a gazebo drenched in moonlight. Chakotay took a seat at one end of a bench, and Kathryn sat down at the other end. They were silent awhile, staring at the moonlight sparkling on the nearby fountain, until Kathryn turned to him. “The truth, Chakotay.”
He sighed. “What you said in your speech about the Maquis affected me deeply, Kathryn. What you said about a leader sacrificing, serving, loving their crews brought tears to my eyes, because you did all those things and more. I heard what you said about me, about how I helped you, and I felt bad. I know I could’ve done more. I know I hurt you, disappointed you, let you down more than once. I couldn’t face you. I couldn’t face the truth.”
She looked skeptical. “Are you sure it wasn’t because I was with Richard?”
“Richard?” He tried to make his laugh genuine.
She looked at him steadily. “You didn’t expect me to remain celibate for the rest of my life, did you?”
He ran his hand through his hair. “Kathryn . . . “
“No, Chakotay, really. You may think that Richard has replaced you as my best friend. I know I worried about that happening to me when you started seeing Seven.”
He looked up at her in surprise. “You did?”
“Of course I did. I didn’t want to lose your friendship. I needed you. I still need you. Don’t I call you regularly? Don’t I ask for your advice all the time?”
Chakotay nodded. They did still talk by subspace every few months, and they always seemed to pick up their friendship right where they’d left off. “It was hard to see you with him.”
“I know it was. I know it is. It’s hard for me to see you and Seven together, too, and I still miss that closeness we had on Voyager. But, I know you’ll always be my friend.” She scooted over to him and put her hand on his arm. “You promised you would always be my friend.”
He covered her hand with his. “I meant that.”
“So did I. Richard and Seven will have to accept that.”
He looked up at her, suddenly ashamed. “I wasn’t very nice to Richard. I accused him of using you, of not being sincere.”
“Chakotay, do you really think I could be with someone who was insincere?” She sighed. “Can we start fresh tomorrow? Pretend tonight never happened?” She saw him nod and stood up. “Good. I’m sure Richard will understand why you feel so protective of me. You were, after all, my first officer for seven years. Old habits are hard to break.”
They started back toward the hotel. “I’m sorry, Kathryn. I’ll make it up to you. I know Richard’s considered one of the brightest legal minds in decades, and for good reason. I’m grateful for the way he defended you and the doctor, for the way he short circuited the case against Seven.”
“Let’s just enjoy this time together. It’s been so long, and who knows when we’ll all be together again. Please.”
“You can count on me,” he promised.
Kathryn arrived at the hotel room a few minutes later, only to find Richard working on stack of PADDS. She slipped out of her shoes, took off her jacket, and collapsed on the sofa. When he finally looked up at her, his eyes were cold. “He’s protective of me, Richard,” she started.
“Protective?” He was still furious. “How long has he been in love with you?”
“That’s not it.”
“I’ve been around, Kathryn. The man’s in love with you.”
“You forget that he’s married, Richard, and to a drop dead beautiful blond with big blue eyes and a figure that will knock your socks off.”
“He might be married, and she might be beautiful, but he’s in love with you.”
She stood up. “This is ridiculous. He’s sorry he was so confrontational. He spent seven years worrying about me day and night, and he still worries. He doesn’t want me to get hurt.”
“He’s why you won’t marry me.”
She didn’t want to go through the marriage argument again. “Richard, I’m going to bed. Tomorrow you and Chakotay start fresh, okay?” She watched him turn back to his work. “Are you coming to bed?”
“Not now. I want to finish reading this brief.”
She watched him for a few minutes, trying to decide what to do, and then she walked over to him and turned his swivel chair so he faced her. “Let’s finish this talk first.”
He grabbed her arm and gently pulled her to her knees in front of him. “Don’t bullshit me, Kathryn. I want the truth.”
“He has nothing to do with why I don’t want to get married. Our jobs barely leave us time for each other as it is. We spend months apart every year. What we have is what I need. I’m perfectly happy with our relationship the way it is now.”
“You’ve explained all that to me, not that I believe you. Chakotay. I want the truth about Chakotay.”
She frowned and looked away, finally sitting down and crossing her legs. “I won’t deny that there’s always been an attraction between us. Chemistry, they call it. But we’ve never acted on it, and we won’t. He was my first officer, Richard.”
“By attraction you mean love.” Kathryn didn’t answer. “Attraction fades, Kathryn. Love endures. Even after seven years in the Delta Quadrant. And he isn’t your first officer any more.”
She shook her head. “For seven years, he was a loyal friend, the only person I could turn to and be myself with. I love him like a friend, Richard. And he’s married to someone very special to me.”
Richard reached down and put his hand beneath her chin, lifting her face so he could look into her eyes. “He broke your heart. By marrying Seven he broke your heart, but you’re too damned proud to admit it.”
She jerked her chin from his hand and stood up, her temper flaring. “I never knew you were such a romantic, Richard. Maybe when you retire you can write romance novels about star-crossed lovers and unrequited love.”
“If you could choose him or me. If Seven disappeared and he was free. Who would you chose?”
She rolled her eyes, unwilling to play his games. “Goodnight, Richard.”
She closed the bedroom door behind her, quickly stripped, and pulled on her gown. Exhausted and emotionally overwrought, she crawled into the bed and buried her face in her pillow so Richard wouldn’t hear her cry herself to sleep.
Hours later, Richard slipped into the bed beside her. Immediately, Kathryn moved to him, as she always did, and pillowed her head on his shoulder. Her voice heavy with sleep, she said, “Please, Richard, let’s not fight. I’ve looked forward to this visit for years, and I can’t bear to have it ruined.” She lifted her head, even though she couldn’t see his face in the dark. “I admit that Chakotay and I have a special, complicated friendship, but that’s all it is—friendship. You shouldn’t be threatened by it. I love you.”
Richard pulled her close. He could tell she’d been crying and felt guilty for spoiling the first night of her reunion with the Maquis. “You’re right. I’ll start fresh tomorrow with Chakotay, as you asked. I promise.”
“Good.” She snuggled into his chest and sighed, quickly falling into a deep sleep.
Richard, though, lay awake for hours, remembering the look on Kathryn’s face when Chakotay approached the table, one of longing, hope, and unqualified joy, and he wished that, just once, she would look at him that way.